Report by Jo Ann Solders. Pictures provided by Sandy Richards, taken with her camera by Craig Jacks.

Sparks Take LA - Moz Meeting too!

Well I survived the most wonderful day of my life. I just got home an hour ago from a whirlwind weekend of Sparks madness. You all read Sandy's post about our meeting up and doing the Sparks caravan down to LA for the show so I'll jump to the O-Rama and my take on it.

Oh first off, thanks to Carl (Oglio - CvB) for all the great work and organization on this. I'm so glad the show was sold out, that's a good thing. I didn't get to say much to you since you were busy, busy, busy but I got a snowdome and got to see who you were at least. I appreciate all you did.

"I Want to Start from before the beginning"
This was my 2nd O-Rama (Chicago was my first exposure to Sparks fans) which was fortunate or else I would have been more overwhelmed than I was. It was great meeting Monte, Timothy Sewell, Iain, Chris Jacks, Jay Bond, Carl Oglio, a couple of Robs, Pauline and others I didn't talk to much (the German guys I saw and smiled at) but whose names I recognized. It was good to meet the person behind the e-mail address. It was also great to meet up with old pals - Madeline and Frank (thanks for the great work on setting this up), Richard and John from the UK . Chris, Sandy and I fit right into The Scene and spent the next 4 hours talking to Sparks fanatics who were busy snatching up Plagiarism underwear, snowdomes, trading records, taking pictures, eating burgers and drinking beer and generally have a GRAND time. Frank was busy documenting us all on his digital camera for that upcoming cinema verite piece about the lives of Sparks fans. I'm ready for my close up Mr. DeMille.

The action wound down at the Red Rock Eatery eventually as we moved over to the Key Club for the two hour wait until the doors opened. We all swooped down to the front of the stage, pitched our tents and anxiously awaited our heroes.
Now I am a truly lucky person as I got to see them last year in the UK, after not seeing them for 14 years before that, but I was even more excited for this concert. Maybe because it was the Maels hometime or maybe because of the great people around me. Electricity and insanity was in the air - oh this was going to be a good time. I was pumped up and ready to Get Crazy with the appearance of Ron and Russell. However, I was floored by what I heard next.

Richard Gardner came up to me and said "Morrissey is here" which I didn't believe at first but then the tone of his voice and look in his face told me differently. I thought he could be there since he was a Sparks fan back in 1974 and spends a lot of time in LA and likes to go out to shows, but could this be true? Now I'm starting to hypervenilate when Madeline drags me out of my spot and said "do you want to meet Moz?" Well, you don't have to tell me twice plus (plus I was numb now) so downstairs we went to the VIP area. Not a lot of people down there (many of us were at the front) but there HE was - HIS MOZNESS - sitting basically alone. He was chatting with John (another fellow Brit) at the next table so after getting my wits about me, I walked over to him and put out my hand saying "Hello Morrissey" and proceeded to sit down next to him. By now, it's not me, I was taken over by alients. I was so calm and collected and articulate and started to converse with him like he was an old pal of mine. Maybe all that Sparks-O-Rama conversing I had done earlier had me on a roll. I don't know but I was not a total geek as I had feared if this day would ever come. We proceeded to have a nice conversation for the next ten minutes (we talked about the several shows I saw last year on his tour, Salt Lake City, Sparks, NY Dolls, Colorado (another story there), opening bands, Kimono My House, Ramones) until Richard Blade interruped to make sure Morrissey was the "real Morrissey" and that he got in okay. Of course, Morrissey said "I'm not the real Morrissey." Moz said something about Ron and Russell putting him on the list etc. etc. Now I'm thinking to myself "here I am sitting next to Morrissey while he and Richard Blade are talking about Ron and Russell this and that, and I'm thinking this is SO WEIRD. My two favorites in the whole world right here in the same place! Anyway, Richard Blade said he was going to introduce Sparks in 15 minutes and was trying to remember if it was 12 or 14 years since they last played in the US.
The words just flew out of my mouth "oh, it's been 12." And everyone nods with that. (I'm trying not to crack up at this point.) Moz said he might try to fight his way upfront but Richard offered him a spot at his table upstairs instead. Good thing because the Sparks maniacs would have been hard pressed to give up their spots. It would have been too distracting for me. All the while, Richard Blade would look at Moz, then me, then Moz, then me, probably wondering if was anyone (I wasn't, I'm just me). I smiled at him and acted as if this was an everday occurence for me. As Richard (yeah my good friends, Richard and Moz) was about to leave, I reminded him of the Sparks after show signing at Tower Records. Again, it was the alien being inside not me speaking. With that Moz and I - Mozzer and Jozzer - talked a few more minutes. I figured I'd better get back upstairs for the show and leave Moz alone, so I shook his hand again, thanked him and grandly turned and swept my velvet jacket aside and left the room in a manner that would have made Joan Crawford proud. When I got outside the door, I couldn't find the door, found it, ran up the stairs and back into the very crowded club to get back in my spot. I was running around in circles and ending up in deadends but I eventually found my way back. By now, I must have looked maniacal because people parted me for to pass without any fuss. I couldn't believe I was so coherent in front of Morrissey but now, back to the matter at hand - Sparks.
I quickly ran back up into my place at the front and I think I started shrieking from what just happened and what was about to happen. What a sight I was I'm sure. I was shaking so much.

Sandy and a few others have mentioned the marvelous intro film already as well as the set list so I won't repeat. All I can say is - Ron Mael Rules All. Mecha-Ron. Only he can do what he does and get away with it and we love him no matter what he does. After hi ho-ing onto the stage, Ron hung up his coat and hat, and got to the business of being the hardest working man in showbiz.
Before Moz, there was Ronald. There is no one in the world like Ron Mael.
Was it just me, or did Ron remind you of Mr. Rogers in the opening film?
There's something so special about Ron and Russell, it's magical to me to have them before me on a stage.

Even though they are now techno trio and not a guitar laden band as they once were, I was just as inspired, awed and amazed with the show. The songs are so classic and Ron and Russ are so original, anything they do now doesn't matter to me. I'm getting quite used to the new look Sparks (well it's been a few years now and I did get to see the UK shows last year). I was not disappointed at having traveled from San Francisco for this show or the UK last year to see Sparks. The moment they hit the stage, I became just as manic as I had in the past singing along to every song except the new one "Balls" and "Knock Off" though this is my third hearing of that one. I like it a lot, the melody haunts me.

Russell looked great (spinning classes and good living I guess) and was quite energetic - jumping and dancing and doing vocal acrobatics as only Russell can do. Various times he would be right in front of me so I was compelled to lightly touch his shoes and hoped he would sweat on me (nope he didn't).
Sandy and I would just start to laugh like 15 year old teenyboppers everytime he got so close to us. At this point, I don't care anymore. This is Sparks after all.

Ron had several "solo" spots - the positive thinking "I Am Ron Mael and I am Okay, dammit" bit, tap dancing in Air Jordans (not an easy feat), the famous Ron dance, and of course, Rex the Wonder Dog does Marlon Brando. I told you he was the hardest working man in the biz.

My favorite songs were "It's a Knock Off", "Falling In Love With Myself Again" "This Town" oh hell, I liked 'em all, I wasn't disappointed that they didn't play "Ladies" or "Pineapple" since their catalogue is so large, they can't play 'em all. "Change" was really a great song to end with. Just Ron and Russell all alone - hasn't it always been this way. Quite moving and very much the story of Ron and Russ - they keep changing and dragging us into the next phase/decade as they go along. I for one, will gladly follow. It's amazing how much we have gone through with these two guys over the last two decades. "Fletcher Honorama meet Rex the Wonder Dog". The special guest didn't materialize onstage, but we had guessed it might have been Jane Wiedlin (it was as I later found out but it didn't work out.) Maybe Weird Al could of helped out?

Oh I can't forget Tammy. She's very cool and ultra friendly and does a great job behind the Mael Brothers Extravaganza. It is not easy to do that you know - help anchor down the whole thing with her drumming and cool demeanor while Ron is dancing sideways and Russell is singing "Do Re Mi" while a bunch of people are screaming "Mickey Mouse", "Profile, Ron, Profile" or "We want Nastassia". Okay, maybe that was only me.

Jo Ann Solders chatting it up with Sparks

After the second encore, and almost two hours later, it was all over so off we went to Tower Records for the signing. We were afraid that we might not get our things signed, though, since it was after eleven and we still hadn't budged an inch. It seems, the staff was overwhelmed by the fans and the manager was screaming and yelling about not having parameters set up BEFORE hand and now there were still too many people waiting. We all got in anyway and the store had to stay open longer than planned. By the time, we got in, we were told only two items for signing (that was what I had anyway) and pictures had to be done simultaneously with the signing or not at all. Move along, pal.

Jo Ann from another angle

Oh, going back, outside the store I got to meet the famous Ned Raggett. His list helped bring us all together during the last 3 years so, I for one, am eternally grateful. Someone said they printed out his picture and had it in the hotel room. We are a demented bunch, Ned. I was touched that he asked for me by name and made sure he found his was to meet the listers. I'm glad that Russ mentioned how much they appreciated the internet people for their support. Ned, that one was for you.

It was finally my turn.. I said hello again and they remembered me from last year (I got to talk to them after each show) and all the years of me bombarding the fan club as a teenager. I told them it was a GREAT show and they were gods since they could inspire both Weird Al Yankovic and Morrissey out to see their show. With that Russell, said "oh yeah Morrissey is your OTHER guy" as he looks over at Ron and laughs. I totally started to blush now - yes I'm two-timing Ron - there I've said it. Ron then said that he REALLY wanted Morrissey to be on Plagiarism. "What song did you want to do with him" I asked. "ANYTHING" Ron replied and said I should talk to Morrissey about it. All I could do was laugh by now at that one. Then Ron said he liked my earrings (my cool Frida Kahlo bottlecap ones). Now I was speechless. My idol complimenting ME about my accessories. I'm hella-cool now. I think someone took pictures of me talking to the Maels - I hope so because I need to know I wasn't dreaming this all up. Tammy signed my CDs too, but added "I wasn't on this one but I'll be on the next one" I said, it's okay, you signed my other one. She smiled and said "in Norwich right." Damn, they're on to me. I better start wearing a disguise to future signings or else they'll think I'm a deranged fan who travels distances and waits for hours in line....errr, anyway.... After seeing the Maels again, I was once again overwhelmed. I couldn't find the way out so I sort of wandered in circles (this is a pattern - meet an idol - walk in circles.). No one seemed to steer me the right way or hurry me out either but somehow I found Chris, Sandy, Craig and my Moz-pal-Mel outside with their signed items. However, I was hella-cool once again, when it came to talking to Ron and Russell and managed to put sentences together and everything and not appear too flustered. That wasn't always the case in the past. "uhh... I like.....love.....fan club....nastassia....thanks...."

Afterwards, we all stumbled out into the street, still blubbering and foaming at the mouth, taking pictures to finish off our rolls of film, limping and aching from the long drive, day and night, drove home through a daze, crumpled into our beds and mumbled about Our Great Sparks Adventure before falling asleep with smiles on our faces or we lived happily ever after or somethng like that.

Until the next Great Adventure. After the new album comes out "sorta soon" perhaps?

Jo ("When You Wish Upon a Star") Solders #441

Sorry for the long post, I'm delirious and still so hyped up but so exhausted but I ain't complaining